Mourning

My dearest Lise.

I’ve written about so often, but still it doesn’t seem like enough. I think about you every day, and I miss you every day…

You were one of I kind and my love for you will last forever. I want your legacy to live on, I just have no idea how.

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You still haunt me in my dreams, yesterday I had a horrible nightmare again. You were in it, you and Legacy.

You and Legacy was living on a small farm far from my home. Just the two of you. I know that you two never were friends in real life, but you were in this dream.

I got a call from the owner of the stable telling me to come quick. I jumped on my bike and drove faster than ever. Thousand of horror scenarios were playing inside my poor head. Something was wrong, all wrong.

I arrived at this beautiful stable. My dream place. A small cute yellow farm, with green planes and tall trees. Everything was perfect and idyllic.

Until I saw you lying there on the ground. You and Legacy where lying in opposite sides of the pasture.
I was all alone.

It was clear that I couldn’t save you, but Legacy maybe. I took my phone, but I couldn’t dial the vets number. I tried and tried, while tears were running hysterically down my red cheeks. Finally I get in touch with a vet and they tell me that they are coming as fast as possible.

I get Legacy on his feet, he has colic so I’m walking with him, while seeing you lying there. After what seems like an eternity the vet finally arrives. The vet starts helping Legacy and I run to you.

I sit there with your head in my lap. Watching you die slowly, the light leaving your eyes. On the other side of the plane I see the vet putting Legacy down.

I feel like I’m choking on my tears.

Both of you left this world at the same time. I’ve dreamed about your death thousands of times, but I have no idea why Legacy was in this one.

I’m sick of nightmares, waking up drowned in tears. But if that’s the only way that I can have more time with you, I don’t mind at all….

I miss you and I still cry every time I see your halter or saddle, but I don’t mind. You are a big part of me and I will never forget you.

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About theevilicequeen

Hi, I'm the only true IceQueen left in the world.. I have passed the exams, and now I'm in control of snow and ice all over the world... It's pretty fucking awesome....
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3 Responses to Mourning

  1. stenfalk says:

    okay wow, I think you are better than me at tormenting yourself… but thanks for fighting for Legacy… 😉
    did you ever know what happened to the foals Lise had? Just asking… Not that you should buy one of them, but maybe seeing them or I dont know… talking to their owners, could help a little?
    I am sure Lotte knows how to track them down, Hell I might even know… That could be a little funny, couldn’t it?

    • Hehe yeah I’m horrible… 😉

      Hmm that could actually be kinda fun, weird that I’ve never thought of that… I just don’t know where to start, because I know that the number I have to the previous owner is wrong.. But, I’ll look into it 🙂

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