I drive myself crazy. I do. I can’t stop looking at horses, I do it every single day. I also look for places where my horse could stay. It’s silly because I don’t have either the funds or the time at the moment for a horse, so I should just stop looking. You may think what’s the harm in looking? Yeah, I said that to myself several times, but the problem is I have found two little sweethearts who’s just perfect.
I have looked for a while and sometimes found possible subjects. I had found a beautiful little very cheap red mare, but I can see that she’s already been sold. When I realised that now I couldn’t buy this cute little girl, I almost cried. Weird, I know. Therefor I really shouldn’t keep looking because I hate finding what might be the right horse, and then not be able to bring her home. That sucks.
I miss horses so much. At the moment I look after one of my friends horses once in a while, Knut. He’s a very sweet horse, but he’s old and is who he is. I would like a horse that I can shape and have goals with. Where Knut lives there is this fourteen year old horse named Alfa, I’m strangely drawn to this adorable red mare. Her owner and I have previously discussed me riding her, because the owner simply can’t anymore. I would really like to ride her, I just don’t have the guts to say so. I also kinda fear that I’m just gonna get sick of her, then I would feel bad about leaving this beautiful mare behind.
It’s very different to look after other people’s horses than your own. I’m constantly afraid of doing something wrong with others horses. With my own… Well, I did loads of things wrong, but she was mine. Mine alone, so the consequences were all on me and her. No third parties.
I miss having my own horse. One where I call the shots. My responsibility. Me, mine, my horse.
So, right now I’m kinda stuck in between. Fourty percent of me wants to do whatever and buy my own horse. Fourty percent wants to ride Alfa. Finally twenty percent wants to continue as is. In a couple of months I will have money. Have money to buy things, go on vacations and go out to dinner. I will be able to save up money for my future house.
So… I’m stucked… Confused…
My sensibility tells me that buying a horse is a waste of money, and will continue being a huge expense for many many years. If I turn my sense off, well then I just miss racing through the forest and practice show jumping. I miss interacting with horses, horsemanship, petting and grooming. Yesterday I even missed mucking a stall, I know that’s a feeling that wont last, but it was there.
So, what to do? I honestly have no idea. Hopefully I’ll soon figure it out.
But, I just have to show you my two little mares. They are so cute. First of there’s Hidden Treasure, she costs 7000 Danish crones which is roughly 950 Euros. She will be around the height of 163 centimeters, which is perfect for me. She’s one year old.
Not the best picture, but she is cute.
Then there’s my favourite Wojska. She’s two years old, will be around the height off 155 centimeters. She costs 6000 Danish crones around 800 Euros. She’s one of the most beautiful horse that I’ve seen in a long time, and the real cause off my dilemma.
I’m in love. She’s been for sale for a while, so there is probably something wrong with her but she’s just so beautiful. She might be a little bit to small, but I don’t think that it would be a big problem, I could just lose some weight 😉
I don’t care about their pedigree or whether they are purebred or mixed, all that stuff holds little value to me. The most important thing is that there’s a good chemistry, that it’s a horse that I want to work with, who’s fun. I will much rather buy a cheap horse and then we’ll see what they’ll turn into, than buy an expensive horse and then it has to become something. I’d rather be pleasantly surprised than the other way around.
My first horse, Lise I bought only based on feelings. She was a too much of a handful for a little twelve-year-old girl. But, the connection was there. I feel in love with her instantly, I only saw possibilities. Lise is the best thing that has ever happened to me, she was an extraordinary horse. Her pedigree wasn’t anything, she didn’t have amazing gaits or anything, but she was perfect for me. Because she was who she was.
I’m not looking for her replacement, because no one can replace your first love. But I’m looking for a horse who can give me what she did. Confidence, joy and great experiences.